Raising Modern Day Knights

Recently one of our men attended a ceremony for his grandson at the grandson's church. The ceremony was basically a "coming of age" ceremony. The boy was becoming a man. Our man commented how impressed he was with the ceremony and how big an impact it had made.

It got him wondering, and me as well. Unlike many tribes and peoples, our culture has little or no ceremonies for children, particularly boys, concerned with the passage into manhood. I can think of the Bar Mitzvah for Jewish boys, and the quinceanera for girls who reach the age of 15 in the Mexican culture.

How do boys become men? Who will help them? We live in culture that has largely demasculinized men. I wonder if this could be one reason for the large number of incarcerated men who admittedly had little or no good relationships with their fathers.

All of this has set me to find the answers to the questions. I also will do something I've never done before- preach a series of messages on fatherhood this May-June. We need to recover a sense of manhood in our churches and in our culture. It is also no secret that men are staying away from the church in droves. Perhaps a recovery of true manhood- modern day knighthod- complete with its rituals, training and mores could help.

I'm on a quest.

Transitioning

Back on May 30, 2001, I attended a transitioning conference at People's Church, in Brentwood, Tennessee. It was notable in that the conference had been cancelled, but the handful of attendants didn't get the message until we arrived. Thus, the pastor and staff got us around a round table for a discussion of transitioning issues in a local church. The dialogue was probably more beneficial to me than other conferences I have attended with large groups and "star" speakers.

Among the notes I recently rediscovered:

"16% of the people are absolutely unchangeable. Get used to it."

"To get on with my life, I must face pain."

"We can't lead from preferences. There are too many."

"The laypeople bring involvement to the table. Staff brings commitment."

Advice For Leading Through Change:

1. What is your pain threshold?

2. Relationships, not authority are the keys to leading through change.

3. Decide wisely what hill you are willing to die on.
Some changes are not worth going through.
Maybe you don't need to change something as to start a new thing around it.

4. Decide that core values will drive change, not fads.

5. Guide changes through the mission statement.

6. Introduce ideas regarding change regularly in small groups.

7. Give people time to understand and process change. "Family chats."

8. Communicate, communicate, communicate.

9. Follow a season of intensity with a season of stability.
Down time is important for people.
Sermon series

10. Celebrate, congratulate, appreciate.

11. Create a change culture. Create a culture rather than a change thing.

12. Teach your way out of problems and through change.
Strong leadership doesn't guarantee the absencce of problems.
Rapid growth doesn't excuse unmet needs.
A large church doesn't mean an ineffective ministry.

Spring Break

This week has been...quiet. My family is visiting out of town and I am left behind. "When I come home, my house is dark and pots are cold." I find myself turning on some kind of noise so that it doesn't seem quite so lonely. I understand again God's wisdom in that "it is not good that man should be alone."

On the plus side, I have been able to get many things done:

1. I have reinstalled the Tiger operating system on my Mac. (No small task in and of itself.) This led me to get the new Leopard operating system which arrived today, after being ordered on Monday. Fast service!

2. Because of #1, I have had to backup all my music and files on a backup drive. Again, that is no quick task.

3. I fixed the bad rear tire on my bike (twice- after the "guaranteed not to leak" new tube did so.)

4. I took the bike on a very long ride which ended with the "guaranteed" tube going flat about a mile and a half from home. "Long walk." "Yep."

5. Because it is Spring, the grass has resumed its relentless growth which required yardwork. There was plenty of time for it, especially since the front curb has never been edged before. It will be easier the next time and the next time and the next time and the next...

6. I was able to reorganize my notes and plans for preaching for the next several weeks.

7. I spent extra time at the gym.

8. I didn't spend much time cooking. 'Nuff said.

9. I could watch anything I wanted on TV.

10. I left shoes in the floor every night. No one complained.

Actually, it has been quiet in my world all around. We have had fewer folks in the hospital this week, two staff member off, and less emergencies than usual. I'm try to be realistic, knowing that this too, shall pass.

Everybody needs a break. Mine is coming. In the meantime, someone has to make a living.

Resurrection Day

By convention, we call the day "Easter." It is a wonderful day to celebrate victory- victory over sin, death, and the grave. It is a wonderful day to see old friends, church and family members again and to wish them our best...until we see them again next "Easter."

For us, it was a glorious day. The sunny blue skies could not have made for better weather. The temperature was a bit on the cool side but tolerable. Inside the spirit of the church was also warm and sunny. I don't think I've ever heard our choir and orchestra do a better job. I preached that Jesus endured Friday because Sunday was coming. The service felt powerful and Spirit led. An usher shared that for the first time since he'd been counting, the two middle sections of our church had been above 100 people each. It was a comfortably full auditorium. I was invited to some friend's house for "Easter Gumbo" in part because my wife is out of town visiting her family. I enjoyed the day.

But...

Not to spoil the mood, but I do have a few thoughts on "Easter."

1. Instead of "Easter," I like to call it "Resurrection Day." Isn't that what it is? Agreed that it is a bit awkward, but I have to admit I wanted to substitute this term for "Easter" at every chance I got.

2. I wish everyone who attended church yesterday would make it a regular habit.

3. Over the years, I find that finding fresh ways to proclaim the message of the empty tomb is challenging. It is an old story. But I don't want to lapse into a tired retelling of it. It is too powerful for that.

4. Obviously, our churches have musicals and special events for Resurrection Day, but shouldn't we put the same kind of effort into each Lord's Day?

5. I'll save yesterday for the rainy day file. When things aren't going as well in life or the church, I'll pull out this rose and smell it again.

Oh, the savory fragrance of being in the Lord's House on Resurrection Day!

Fusion

I have spent the better part of the day with my dear friend, Vic Simpson, now a pastor in Maryland who led a number of church leaders in the Fusion and Evangelism seminars.  The Fusion Seminar is concerned with how to turn first time guests into fully engaged members of the church.  These seminars are a fairly new phenomena and we had to work out a few bugs in order to host it.

It was rewarding to have 22 people from as far away from Houston, TX attend.  This says that the material is needed and that the ministry of Church Leader Insights is becoming well known.  I was pleased that we are able to extend the ministry of Nelson Searcy, originator of the material, Vic Simpson, presenter of the material, and our church as distributor of the material.  I am prayerfully hopeful that we are impacting the kingdom of God from our little corner of Southwest Louisiana.

I have struggled for many years with how to close the "back door" of the church.  We have a wide front door, but once people have come through the door, what then?   Fusion provides some guidance.

As if to have the point made clear, one of our laypersons pointed out that in our church, a young person had checked boxes on a communication card desiring to be of service and no one had contacted her.  Ouch!  But it is something I need to hear. We all struggle finding people to do ministry.  But here is a gift handed to us, and we practically reject it.

Connecting people with ministry and service opportunities through our church is fulfilling to me as a church leader and for those involved.  They get a win, our church gets a win, and the kingdom of God is advanced. How could we go wrong?

It's been a long day, but a good day.  The real challenge is to implement the principles we studied.  Fortunately, I now have a team with which to do it.  Lesson for church leaders: Always encourage people to attend conferences and seminars with you.  When you implement new ministries and strategies, you have a support team already in place.

Who Is The Real Celebrity?

Of all places, it happened at a Texas Baptist Evangelism Conference I once attended.  But it is happening every day.
 
Three speakers were on the program that night.  One was a pastor.  One was an evangelist.  One was a professional football player.  Each man spoke of what Christ meant in his life.  Each man gave inspiring messages. 
 
The phenomenon I noticed occurred when the session was over.  As the people spilled out of the convention center, some stayed behind to visit with the speakers.  Who do you think attracted the biggest crowd?
 
The evangelist who poured out his heart?  The pastor who shared a powerful message God placed on his heart?  Or the football player who told of his Christian faith on and off the field?
 
You probably guessed it.  When the session was over, the crowd swarmed around the football player, seeking his autograph.  Hardly anyone spoke to the evangelist or pastor.  These two stood around smiling at folks and watching them crowd the football player.
 
Don't get me wrong.  I am glad for football players who live for Christ on and off the field.  Our society seems to worship sports figures and actors.  But it tends to ignore at best and insult at worst, preachers.
 
In eternity, will it matter whether one was a sports star or preacher?  Will one be more important than another to God?  I think not.  Our God is no respecter of persons.  It will not matter who they were in this life, how popular they were, or how well they played the game.  But it will matter whether they knew Jesus.  When they know him, everyone is special.
 
 

Easter Celebration

We spent a couple of sunburned hours yesterday on the church grounds manning beanbag toss booths, snack and treat tables, and a dunking booth, among other things.  I was greatly relieved, for it was my understanding that I would be a "victim" of the dunking booth.   Fortunately, I was spared by a couple of men who joyfully took turns being dunked.  "It's all for the cause,"  they agreed.

Of course, there was the traditional Easter egg hunt for the younger children.  I saw no frowns anywhere.  All seemed to be having a great time.

It was a glorious afternoon, the kind that I would order and save for a rainy day if I could.  A couple of people were discussing various types of sunscreen which made me wish I had I brought and used some of my own.  Fortunately, as I write a day later, my face is only slightly pink.

It was joy to see young families come out.  Some carried young children, others pushed strollers, and some simply chased their children around.

There was a table set up where volunteers shared "Gospel Candy," which is the story of the Gospel told with sweets.  It was a colorful hit as well.

The Celebration was a team effort headed up by our able children's minister, Amy.  

As I perused the Saturday paper, I noticed that seemingly every other church in our area had the same idea. There were bouncy jumps and egg hunts- "The Area's Largest," one headline shouted.  Some are doing them this weekend, some next weekend.  But seems everyone is doing them.

But one question our children's minister asked last weekend has me wondering.  "What if we took the money we spend on Easter Celebration and do something else with it?"  I wish she wouldn't ask questions like this.  I haven't stopped thinking about the implications of this think-out-loud query. 

What if we took the money we spent on Easter Celebration and used it some other way to reach and minister to people?

There would be fewer  bouncy jump rentals, which are a momentary thrill.  There would less candy bought, which may save trips to the Dentist.  And there would be the possibility of someone being touched with the gospel of Jesus Christ, which can save a soul.

What if?  The possibilities simply shine like the sun on beautiful Spring afternoon.

I Feel Sad

I feel sad for New York governor Eliot Spitzer and especially for his wife and three daughters after being caught in an FBI wiretap for soliciting prostitutes.  I am certain that more "revelations" are forthcoming.  Next, we will hear of some call girl who will step forward and tell all about this sordid affair.  Books and movie deals are surely not far behind.

Frankly, I've heard all I want to hear about it.  Just watching the video as this man apologized (but didn't) while his wife looked on with dull saddened eyes was all the message I needed to get.  I feel sad.

I also feel sad for two pastor friends of mine who are being forced to leave their pulpits under internal and external pressure.  While I know no specifics, I know they are hurting.  I hurt for them, too.

Some messes are of our own making, as in the governor's case.  Others come simply because we live in conflicted, adversarial world of often unrealistic expectations and unfulfilled wishes.

I feel sad.

I Now Pronounce You Man And Mushroom Dip

They say the wedding was no joke.

Over the weekend, Brian Anstey and Elka Shapiro were married in a ceremony comedienne Kathy Griffin performed.  

This "wedding" of the two New Yorkers featured off color jokes and comments by the "minister" as well as a recital of the reception menu by the bride.  It was all in good fun, apparently.  The happy couple are fans of Griffin's who requested that she officiate their wedding ceremony.   In order for the ceremony to be legal, the officiant had to be "ordained" or at least duly authorized by the state of New York to perform the ceremony.

No problem.  Griffin had her assistant go online and "Wah-la," within minutes, the comedienne was an ordained minister.  There were a few more hurdles to cross with the state, but nevertheless the newly ordained "minister" was duly authorized to tie the knot for the lovely couple.

The couple themselves claim no religion or dogma, instead insisting that the major factor in their relationship is "laughter."  How sweet.

Unfortunately, marriage is no laughing matter.

What we are now witnessing is the final blows in a battle to preserve what is sacred and holy in life and American culture.  When wedding ceremonies become a dirty joke and when the "minister" gets ordained online in five minutes, we have witnessed the deconstruction of a holy institution.

Griffin, by the way, is also noted and scorned for her willingness to poke fun at Jesus.  Apparently nothing is sacred anymore; not even marriage.

I find this "wedding" described as having participants and guests in hysterics is no laughing matter.  It is very sad that a wedding ceremony and the marriage it solemnizes is now stripped of any vestige of seriousness. This is more a commentary on American society than it is the Anstey's marriage.  

Marriage is now a joke.  Pardon me if I just don't get it.

i2 Innovative Impact

I just returned with two staff members and one of our support staff from Innovative Impact Conference held at the Fellowship of The Woodlands in the greater Houston area.  this church is a remarkable church, having grown from a handful of members to over 12,000 in attendance in about 11 years.

The staff and church was extremely gracious and kind, sharing information and wonderful food for the body as well as the soul.  The church campus is gorgeous, with waterfalls, ponds and lots of greenery and trees surrounding it.  It seems like a peaceful retreat nestled among the bustle of a major urban area.

There was much to learn from the speakers and breakout conferences, but I think that the greatest value comes in "takeaways" from the conference.  Each of us was exposed to areas of ministry and fresh ideas for our ministries.  I told the team on the way home that I wasn't interested in getting another notebook full of notes as I was in translating those notes into actions item.  This is precisely what happened on the way home today as we began to think creatively as a team.  This creative team thinking will serve us well as we serve our church together.

One thought that has intrigued me is how Kerry Shook, senior pastor of FOTW, Ed Young, Jr. of Fellowship Church in Grapevine, TX, and Joel Osteen of Lakewood church are all from Houston, all are pastor's sons, all are roughly from the same generation, and all have built churches and ministries arguably greater than their father's.  I was itching to know exactly how three young men from the same hometown could do so well simultaneously.

When I caught up with pastor Shook as he relaxed between events, I told him I wanted to ask him a question that had no answer.  I then proceeded to ask how three PK's from the same town would all build ministries that make impacts beyond their own fathers'.  His answer was, as he is, very gracious.  Hey, I'm just glad he'd give me the time of day.

Kerry noted that his father had built into his life a strong foundation- the kind that he wanted to build into his own sons' lives.  He, too, remarked these facts concerning him, Joel Osteen, and Ed Young, Jr. were quite unusual and seemed a bit taken by them as he reflected.  These young men were very fortunate indeed to have had fathers who not only served the flock of God well, but also shepherded their own families.

I pray that I will build the same strong foundation into lives of my own sons.

I left the conference with the same conflicting thoughts I have had for many similar events:  

"I don't want to ever go again; I can't wait until next time!"

New Blog

I have begun a second blog, because I certainly have nothing else to do. It is called "Dr. Truett Said..." It will feature quotable quotes from the celebrated former pastor of First Baptist Church, Dallas, TX.

This feature is part of my effort to keep his legacy and message alive.

Click here and enjoy.

Huckabee Hits The Reset Button

Another "Super Tuesday" has come.  Another presidential candidate has thrown in the the towel.  Republican contender Mike Huckabee officially ended his campaign tonight and pledged to get behind nominee John McCain for the good of his party and for the good of the country.  He said that it had come time to, as when a computer freezes up, hit the reset button for his campaign.

In his concession speech, Huckabee firmly, yet gently reminded the nation that he had stayed in the race until the very end.  He also quoted the apostle Paul, who himself once wrote that he had "run the race...,finished the course..., and kept the faith."  He had also run an honorable campaign, on very limited personnel and resources and surprised many observers in the process.

I have made no secret that I personally supported Gov. Huckabee.  Actually, I met him and worked with him a few times when he was pastor in Texarkana, AR almost 20 years ago.  Even then, I recognized something special about him.  I once sent him a get well card in the mail and noted that I would like to write his biography some day.  (Note to Mike:  That offer still stands!)  He wrote back, not mentioning the offer, but did say that he appreciated my note and even reflected that some other pastors were actually praying for his recovery!  Mike has a wonderful sense of humor.  

Back then, Huckabee defied categories.  When he ran for president of the Arkansas Baptist Convention, the moderates considered him a fundamentalist, and many fundamentalists were concerned that he was closet moderate.  Nevertheless, he won the election and presided over the convention with the same graciousness and goodwill for which he is famous.

So I am a bit sad tonight.  I am also astounded that leading conservative Christians refused to endorse a man who shared their values, not that it would have made much of a difference.  I attended the announcement ceremony in Texarkana when pastor Mike announced that he wanted to become Senator Mike from Arkansas.  Then, as now, I am sure, he wanted to make a difference.  He was concerned for the values that a majority of Americans hold dear and wanted to make the biggest splash possible to try to recover them.

Then, as now, there were those who criticized him for "leaving the ministry" to enter politics.  After all, some opined, politics was too dirty and evil.   Huckabee countered that if this were so, evil had triumphed because good people did nothing.  He, for his part, would be one who would at least try.

So my hat is off to you, Gov. Huckabee, along with my deepest respect, admiration, and prayers.   Keep running the race, for the race is not always to the strongest or the swiftest.

Say, doesn't McCain need a vice presidential nominee?

Then again, who will run for the Republican nomination in 2012?

I close with one of my favorite poems written by Edgar Guest- one I have turned to countless times for inspiration and courage.  It was read at my ordination for the ministry.  Here are the ending lines, lines appropriate for this evening:

Without any doubting or quiddit,
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn't be done, and he did it.
There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done,
There are thousands to prophesy failure;
There are thousands to point out to you one by one,
The dangers that wait to assail you.
But just buckle in with a bit of a grin,
Just take off your coat and go to it;
Just start to sing as you tackle the thing
That 'cannot be done,' and you'll do it.

It's Raining Outside-But That's Not Unusual

One thing it does do very well in Southwest Louisiana- rain.  I had to go to Lafayette today to teach a class.  On the way there, the wind caused me to do some fancy dipsy doodling between the white lines of my lane.

On the way home, the rain joined the wind and blowing rain to just about blow me down.  I happened to go to a fast food restaurant.  Every time the door opened, everyone's napkins and wrapping papers ended up on the opposite wall- not to mention the continuation of a very bad hair day for everyone.  Is that MY taco that just sailed across the room like a boomerang?

On the way home, as one takes his or her life into his or her respective hands on I-10, the rain came down in sheets.  Heavy sheets.  As large trucks appeared out of nowhere and left me behind, they also left rooster tails at least 20 feet high.  All of this led to some tense moments and times of deep prayer as my hands stayed gripped to the steering wheel.  I was thankful for functioning windshield wipers as well.

One of the most unusual aspects of inclement weather in our area is how on a consistent basis one can be caught in a drenching shower on one side of town and drive a mile or two out and find things as dry as a bone.  One can literally cross a line from downpour to drought.  Unlike any area I have known, it tends to rain in spots in southwest Louisiana.  And not only does it rain, but when it rains, it pours.  Sure enough, when I safely emerged from the rain soaked rice fields, I discovered that back home only a sprinkling of rain fell.

Like nowhere else as well, I have observed monsoons take place practically any time of the year here.  In fact, I read not too long ago that the Lake Charles area (of which we are a part) is on the top 10 list for average yearly rainfall in the U.S., ahead of cities like Seattle.  Go figure!

While we're on the subject, there is a mystery I've been trying to solve.  I recall some of my oldtimer friends from the swamps of southwest Arkansas sharing the folk wisdom "Thunder in February,.....?"  I think the correct version is "Thunder in February, frost in April."  A week ago, it thundered here.  It was February.  I can't wait until April to see if this is true.

I guess Brook Benton said it best, "It seems like it's raining all over the world."

Anyone seen my umbrella?

Change?

They say that the only person who likes change is a wet baby.  The older I get, the more I realize how true that statement is.  It has been shown in research studies and in real life that many people choose to die rather than change their lifestyles or habits.

Except, it seems, in politics.

The two current Democratic contenders for the presidential nomination are running on a platform of "change."  You see it on big signs in front of their podiums.  They say the word a number of times in their speeches.  Is there a required quota  that the term must be used?  You hear them talk about it in debates and forums.

I have a two questions.  First, what do they mean by "change?"  That term is ill defined in their speeches and conversations.  They talk about "change" and never really say what they mean by it.  I believe this is a carefully crafted strategy.

By leaving the term "change" nebulous, the potential voter is left to define what "change" means to him or her.  By being able to define one's own definition of change, then the voter mentally connects the dots and votes for the candidate of "change" because he or she represents EXACTLY what the voter wants it to mean.  Hence, the voter thinks he gets what she wants because she is voting for something that only exists in her mind.

Clever tactic.  Don't clearly define "change" so that the voter defines it and votes for his definition of it.

That's my first question.  Now for my second question.

Is it just me, or is it not obvious that the very fact that we will most definitely have a new president in the White House in 2009 quite a change enough?  George Bush's leaving office will be a big change all by itself.  So, whether anyone gets elected president, the very fact that President Bush has to leave office due to constitutional mandates is change enough.

In effect, no one need vote at all, if one follows this thought.  Change will come voluntarily or involuntarily- with or without me.

Say, isn't that the most insidious aspect of change, anyway?